Pinocchio: Unstrung review
The Twisted Childhood Universe delivers a good one. No strings attached.
New movie reviews will not contain spoilers.
Pinocchio: Unstrung
Directed by Rhys Frake-Waterfield
Written by Rhys Frake-Waterfield
Starring Jude-Evan Loyd, Richard Brake and Robert Englund
Pinocchio: Unstrung Review
I’ve been keeping a close eye on the “Twisted Childhood Universe” since it began. There was a lot of buzz around the release of Winnie-the-Pooh: Blood and Honey as it was the initial movie in a quick boom of public domain horror movies. A slasher movie where the killer is Winnie-the-Pooh? Sold. Unfortunately, that movie sucked. Luckily for all involved…it didn’t manage to kill the entire concept before it could even get going. Then a funny thing happened. The movies started to get better.
Blood and Honey 2 was a marked improvement over its predecessor. They even had the foresight to disconnect it (and future entries) from that first movie. The sequel rendered it a movie within a movie…a bastardized version of the real story. Basically, they made lemonade out of a lemon. Blood and Honey 2 still wasn’t what I’d call “good”, but it was watchable. Peter Pan: Neverland Nightmare was even better than that. It took a more interesting, psychological tactic and did more interesting things with the characters. Bambi: The Reckoning took things another half step forward. While still not what I would label “good” it was a fun and, at least, pretty good effort. That brings us to Pinocchio: Unstrung. The first “good” movie in the Twisted Childhood Universe.
I’m not going to pretend that Pinocchio: Unstrung is perfect. There are plenty of nits to pick if you choose. Performances remain all over the map…something made more obvious by adding a quality actor like Richard Brake to the main cast. But it has a lot of things going for it. Most importantly, Pinocchio: Unstrung features one of the most interesting killers we’ve seen in a while. The puppet looks good…and it moves like a puppet…and they gave it a fascinating personal journey. There are some laughs and some quality gore…but it’s the story of Pinocchio himself that elevates Pinocchio: Unstrung to the top of the Twisted Childhood Universe heap.
Pinocchio wants to be a real boy…we all know the story. Unstrung turns that into a fetch quest for human organs. There are several quality horror scenes that feature the wooden puppet gleefully bashing and slashing his way through who he considers to be “bad people”. That last part is what makes the movie work. Pinocchio himself isn’t necessarily bad. But he is ignorant of societal rules or morality or pretty much anything other than wanting to become a real boy. Even that drive isn’t Pinocchio’s fault. We learn why he is so desperate to become real…and it isn’t driven by evil or malice. He’s doing things he doesn’t understand that he shouldn’t do for a reason that isn’t his fault.
It doesn’t make him any less violent, of course. Especially once that pesky cricket (Robert Englund) starts buzzing around as his psychotic conscience. Pinocchio’s only goal, aside from becoming a real boy, is to protect his only friend James (Cameron Bell). Geppetto (Brake) crafts Pinocchio so that his grandson James can have a friend. He’s suffered tragic losses in his life…and Geppetto wants him to have someone who will never leave him. It sounds like a fine idea…but Pinocchio doesn’t understand the world around him. James is bullied by classmates, in pain from a visit to the dentist, and injured in a car accident. Pinocchio (with guidance from some not so friendly friends of his own) believes it’s his duty to protect his friend. Which, in turn, provides the organ donors he needs to complete his personal quest. Put simply, it works.
Pinocchio: Unstrung even manages to work in a crossover from another corner of the Twisted Childhood Universe. Two if you count a character listening to the soundtrack for the original Blood and Honey on his IPod. I thought it was cute. We’re supposed to get a big Avengers style crossover at some point…and Pinocchio: Unstrung certainly leaves the door open to further stories involving the puppet…but for the first time…seeing what’s coming next really doesn’t feel like the threat that it has in the past.
Scare Value
With quality gore, a few good laughs and a genuinely intriguing antagonist…Pinocchio: Unstrung is the first unqualified good movie in the Twisted Childhood Universe. They’ve had a few in a row that weren’t bad…but this one surpasses them all. Fun kill scenes make the middle of Unstrung a joy to watch. An earned ending focused on what makes this version of Pinocchio so interesting keeps you engaged until the credits roll. This once mocked public domain franchise has been turning a corner…and I think it may have just completed the turn.
3/5
Pinocchio: Unstrung Link
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