Hold the Fort review
Welcome to the neighborhood. Here’s your shotgun.
New movie reviews will not contain spoilers.
Hold the Fort
Directed by William Bagley
Written by William Bagley
Starring Chris Mayers, Levi Burdick, Julian Smith, Haley Leary, Mark Ashworth, Tordy Clark, Michelle I Lamb and Andrew McDermott
Hold the Fort Review
There are movies that don’t waste any time getting to the point…and then there’s Hold the Fort. It jumps into the action almost immediately. It’s a good trait for a horror comedy to have. The breakneck pace lets character introductions and head-spinning plot be part of the fun. Instead of bogging itself down in drawn out character beats and subplots…it lets them fly through fast-paced dialog while the you know what is hitting the fan. It fits perfectly with the overall plot too. A couple new to the neighborhood gets a crash course in the one little caveat about living in the seemingly perfect neighborhood. We’re along for the ride as we discover why you should always read the fine print.
Lucas (Chris Mayers) and Jenny (Haley Leary) are (mostly) excited to be first time homeowners. Jenny isn’t thrilled that there is a Homeowners Association with an exorbitant fee attached to it. It turns out to be the least of their problems. The neighborhood they’ve moved to has a dark secret…and it’s set to be revealed before they can even lay down the welcome mat.
Hold the Fort opens with an old lady deciding to sell her house in the neighborhood. We aren’t exactly sure what happened to change her mind…but she emerges from her house, covered in blood, ready to go. Of course, the nature of marketing films will clue you in to what that’s all about if you simply watch a trailer. It’s one of the reasons to applaud a story that doesn’t drag out something most people will know already from reading the plot summary before clicking play on the movie. This neighborhood…has a strange portal that opens once a year sending waves of monsters to kill everyone.
Lucan and Jenny are invited to an equinox party by the Homeowners Association without having read that summary (or the literature provided by the HOA when they arrived). They think they’re walking into a meet and greet…hopefully with booze. They’re actually walking into the yearly neighborhood defense against all types of deadly creatures. The good news is that their new neighbors usually manage to fight them off while remaining more or less intact. The bad news is…that isn’t going to happen this time.
We meet a slew of colorful neighbors and get to see their individual quirks on display. Don’t get too attached to anyone in Hold the Fort though. The bodies are going to pile up almost as fast as the one-liners. For a horror comedy to deliver jokes and deaths as quickly as Hold the Fort manages to while maintaining a solid premise and paying off some character arcs is very impressive. The group will battle witches, a werewolf, and something called the Stickman who no one has ever encountered and lived to talk about. It’s wild stuff. Especially if, like Lucas and Jenny, you had no idea any of this was about to happen. Jumping into things quickly allows the viewer to experience what they’re feeling…even if you came in with a little more information than they did.
Hold the Fort is really funny. Not everything lands, of course…but it throws so many lines and ideas at you so quickly that plenty of them do. It also has a lot of likable characters that are varying degrees of over the top. Sometimes they go out with a laugh…occasionally they go out with an emotional beat…but Hold the Fort isn’t afraid to keep piling up the bodies. Lucas is forced to grow into a role as a leader…one that he is in no way equipped to handle at the beginning of the near-movie long attack. The story does a good job bringing him where he needs to get to…and the cast is fully on board for how ridiculous, and dangerous, their situation is.
At a brisk 74 minutes, Hold the Fort doesn’t include an ounce of fat on it. Lucas and Jenny aren’t even finished unpacking when the portal begins doing its yearly business. They get to know their neighbors, and fall in love with the place, over the course of one brutal, bloody night. It’s also a funny night. Hold the Fort always makes sure it has its narrative arrow pointed at “fun”. Even when it’s killing off many of the people you’re just getting to know. With its fast pace, likable characters, never ending stream of comedy and a monstrous body count…Hold the Fort is a horror comedy that delivers in every way that matters.
Scare Value
Hold the Fort never stops moving. It almost immediately drops you into the middle of a monster rally and explains itself as the blood and one liners are flying. Pacing is a useful tool to a successful horror comedy…and Hold the Fort never takes its foot off the gas. It’s funny, bloody and oddly makes you fall in love with these neighbors…right before it probably kills them. Horror comedy fans will find a lot to like in this brisk and to the point movie.
4/5
Hold the Fort Links
Get it on VOD from Apple TV or wherever you get your VOD
