Halloween (2007) review
We have to cover them all.
Classic movie reviews will contain spoilers.
Halloween
Directed by Rob Zombie
Screenplay by Rob Zombie
Starring Malcolm McDowell, Scout Taylor-Compton, Tyler Mane, Brad Dourif, Danielle Harris and Sheri Moon Zombie
Halloween (2007) Review
Full disclosure: I don’t like reviewing Rob Zombie movies. I never feel like I can be objective about them. I know they have an audience…and I know that I’m not it. The truth is that I find the worldview he brings to most of his projects too depressing to ever find a secondary point. It fits some of his movies better than others. It has never fit anything less than his ill-conceived remake of John Carpenter’s classic Halloween. What’s strange is that I do enjoy listening to Zombie talk about horror. He’s an intelligent guy whose voice adds a lot to every topic he touches on. As a film theorist or horror historian…Rob Zombie is interesting. As the director of Halloween…well…
Halloween is just one of many remakes to arrive during the 00s/early 10s. Almost everything got the remake treatment around that time. I’m not against the concept of remakes as a whole…and Rob Zombie directing a Halloween movie comes with a certain amount of intrigue. There were plenty of bad Halloween movies before 2007. But none of them had the nerve to be bad while retelling the original’s story. If Zombie had turned in Halloween 9 it would probably have been a lot easier to swallow the missteps. Watching it happen to the classic characters in the franchise is a bit tougher.
I knew we were in some trouble with Halloween 2007 well before it came out. It was for a silly reason that had nothing to do with the director, his choices or the quality of his film. It’s because they missed the anniversary. Halloween came out in 1978. Halloween 4 came out in 1988. Halloween H20 came out in 1998. The franchise would return again in 2018. Presumably they’ll figure something out for the fiftieth anniversary in 2028. Meanwhile, Rob Zombie’s Halloween came out in…2007? They couldn’t hold it for a year and fill in the thirtieth anniversary gap? Look, it’s a non-issue that doesn’t affect the movie in any way. But it was worrying that no one cared enough to think about it in the first place. Someone has thought about it every other time.
Zombie’s Halloween adds more backstory to the Michael Myers character. Doing so shows a total lack of understanding what makes the character interesting in the first place. I’ve always let the choice slide in this case, however. The character had been around for 29 years (see how annoying that is) and had enough nonsense happen to him already anyway. Plus, the worst kind of remake is a totally unnecessary one with nothing to say (see Psycho 1998). The additions to the story are the only places where Zombie gets to do something new. So, I want to be clear that the problem isn’t that he chose to do it…it’s what he chose to do with it.
Namely, add more foul-mouthed, dirty hillbillies. When the going gets tough…Rob Zombie is going to add more foul-mouthed, dirty hillbillies. Why he’s never directed a Texas Chainsaw movie when that’s where his heart obviously lies…I have no idea. Halloween works best when it feels like the Boogeyman has come to your quiet suburban neighborhood. Rob Zombie’s Halloween fills the streets with filthy, unlikable people…and wants you to know more about who Michael Myers is than anyone ever cared to. He couldn’t even drop the Laurie Strode/sister angle. The easiest narrative win passed over for…more dirty people.
That’s why Zombie’s movies have never worked for me. The characters he populates them with are almost completely without nuance. They’re all just shades of dirt. Dirty on the inside…often dirty on the outside. He presents hopeless worlds and asks you to play in the muck for a while. Some people enjoy that…and some people even enjoy it in their Halloween movie. I’m just never going to be one of those people. How can you have fear if you don’t have hope? Throwing more filthy people at the screen doesn’t solve the fundamental world view issue that plagues Zombie’s work.
And it’s never felt more out of place than it does in Halloween 2007. Because a large part of Halloween 2007 is just repeating the beats of the original. Just with more unlikable characters playing the roles. The Myers’ clan feels like they’re in a completely different story. An ugly opening before the true remake aspects of the movie kick in. Once we get there…we find everything has changed…but not enough to make it feel new underneath the dirt.
The truth is that the cast of Halloween 2007 is doing a pretty good job with a very tough assignment. Dr. Loomis, Michael Myers, Laurie Strode, Annie Brackett, Sheriff Brackett…these are iconic characters from one of the most famous films ever made. And none of the new actors turn in a bad performance. Malcolm McDowell’s Loomis doesn’t have the charm that Donald Pleasence brought to the original…but his more ego driven take on the role fits this world well. Tyler Mane is a physically impressive antagonist whose mask is one of the best in the series. Any odd choices made with the character aren’t his. Scout Taylor-Compton has the hardest job bringing Laurie Strode back to the screen with a different face and I’ve always found her take on the character perfectly fine. She manages to retain some charm even when the script asks her to play in the same much as everyone else.
And then we have the Bracketts. Danielle Harris returns to the franchise after turning in some incredible performances as a child in parts 4 and 5. Her Annie Brackett doesn’t have the dry, sardonic wit of the original…but that’s the right choice in this movie. When everything around her is several shades darker…brightening the character works incredibly well. Brad Dourif plays her father. He’s great in everything. He’s great here. No surprise. The Bracketts are the highlight of both Zombie Halloweens. Two gifted actors who are able to wade above the muck.
I’ve written about a thousand words on Rob Zombie’s 2007 take on Halloween…and most of them are negative. The best parts of the story are taken from the original. Some added Michael vs. Laurie action at the end feels right for this version. But the rest of his additions would be better off left out. There is one truly positive change here, however. After so many negative statements I’d like to leave this review by mentioning it. Lynda and Bob, Laurie’s friends doomed to be killed after having sex in both versions of the movie, make a much better choice in this one. Instead of having sex in Lindsey’s house after Annie leaves…they head to the Myers house. It’s so much creepier and a perfect fit for any version of the story. It’s genuinely a better choice here than Carpenter’s characters made in 1978. So that’s something. And something is better than nothing. Unless it’s Michael Myers backstory, of course.
Scare Value
Halloween‘s biggest problems don’t exist because it’s a remake. The remake aspect is the only thing that manages to keep it on track. It’s Zombie’s go to aesthetics and depressing world view that hurt it most. The cast is game…and often very good. It’s more brutal…and the brutality is done well. While it was never going to compare to the 1978 original…it at least takes its chance to try some different things. When most of those different things are the worst part of the movie…it’s easy to see where Zombie’s Halloween truly drops the ball. The (stolen) bones are still strong enough to make it watchable, however. We’d see what happens when those bones are removed in Rob Zombie’s Halloween II.
2/5
Halloween (2007) Links
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