Gremlins review
What better movie to revisit this Christmas than the ultimate gateway horror/holiday classic?
Classic movie reviews will contain spoilers.
Gremlins
Directed by Joe Dante
Written by Chris Columbus
Starring Zach Galligan, Phoebe Cates, Hoyt Axton, Polly Holliday, Judge Reinhold, Corey Feldman, Keye Luke and Dick Miller
Gremlins Review
It always comes back to Gremlins. I’m not just talking about the plethora of little monster rip-off movies that proliferated the 80s following its successful release (and merchandising). Nor am I talking about this own website’s penchant for commenting on it in both print and audio formats. No…I’m speaking of something more personal. Gremlins is the first movie that I ever fell in love with. It was my favorite movie from the first time I saw it in 1984 until December 1996 when Scream came along…directly targeted at me as a person. Gremlins is where I discovered horror. And comedy. In fact, Phoebe Cates’ twistedly dark Christmas story (and the way Dante parodies it in Gremlins 2) probably informs my sense of humor as much as anything I’ve ever seen. Gremlins is a seminal film for a generation of movie lovers. The ultimate gateway horror movie. And, for the purposes of writing this today, a Christmas classic.
It’s surprising that it took three Christmases for me to get to Gremlins. It’s my favorite Christmas movie, after all. I don’t believe it’s as controversial to call it such as, say, Die Hard. Gizmo is a Christmas present…it takes place at Christmas…and is set in the picturesque snow-covered small town of Kingston Falls. It has a grinch (Mrs. Deagle), Christmas carols…and the eradication of a species by the Peltzer family. Ok…that last one may not be as in the spirit of the holiday as the others. I’m not that well versed in seasonal lore, sue me.
Joe Dante and Chris Columbus craft their entire twisted tale around the holiday. Christmas tree lots, lights, snowmen…every aspect of the season you can think of is represented. It is then systematically destroyed by a tipped over cup of water and an unplugged alarm clock. In fact, pretty much everything that Gremlins establishes in the first half of the movie is torn asunder by the arrival of this first batch of wild little monsters. It’s one of the best things about Gremlins.
We are introduced to the day-to-day struggles of small-town America. Billy (Galligan) deals with an annoying coworker (Reinhold). His best friend is a child (Feldman) for some reason. Mrs. Deagle (Holliday) is after his dog, Barney. She has the entire town shook…with many under her financial thumb. Billy is forced to provide for his family while his father (Axton) peddles his failed inventions. Now…think of how many of those plotlines are just dropped in the second half of Gremlins. Reinhold and Feldman just vanish from the story! It’s a brilliant stroke. Dante and Columbus introduce us to Kingston Falls…establishing the regular world of its denizens. Then it throws everything into total chaos. What mattered ceases to matter.
This is a long way into a discussion of Gremlins without discussing the titular characters. Both the mogwai and gremlin designs are iconic. Gizmo is adorable. The design has sold a lot of plush toys…and been ripped off plenty of times. He’s the beating heart of Gremlins. And, in the end, the hero of the story. Billy Peltzer may genocide an entire race while they enjoy Snow White and the Seven Dwarves…but Gizmo ultimately sheds a little light on their leader Stripe to save everyone.
The gremlins, activated by breaking one of the three rules for mogwai care, are the ultimate little monsters. They thrive on chaos and destruction. They also do the town a favor by taking out the evil Mrs. Deagle…so there should probably be at least a miniature statue erected in town square. The gremlins are unpredictable, chaotic, funny little monsters. Constantly laughing at the results of their own actions. You couldn’t design a better creature from characteristics to looks. We know that because in over 40 years…no one has.
The three rules of Gremlins have been a source of light-hearted teasing for years. Dante does so himself in Gremlins 2. The rules are important, however. Not just because Billy manages to break two of them by the end of his first day…but because they make the story easily understandable for children. Gremlins isn’t a top-notch gateway horror movie by accident. Every kid in the 1980s knows the rules of owning a mogwai. Don’t get them wet. Don’t feed them after midnight. Don’t expose them to bright light…especially sunlight. That last one is super important once you screw up the first two. Gizmo is the only one of his kind who seems to appreciate these rules. His unintended spawn courts the chaos of gremlin-life. And boy do they get it.
I’d be remis to have ay discussion on Gremlins without mentioning the Kate Christmas story. What in the world was going on there? For those living under a rock, Phobe Cates takes a moment amid all the destruction to inform us why she hates Christmas. It involves a chimney, her father and a broken neck. It’s dark. Not just for a quasi-children’s movie. For most movies. It’s not the first time she has said something bleak. Her leading character trait is seasonal depression. But it is a standout moment for how wildly out of place it feels. I mean this as a compliment.
Everything in Gremlins works. From the little chaos demons to Mrs. Deagle’s take on Almira Gulch from The Wizard of Oz. From Dick Miller’s constantly aggravated neighbor Murray Futterman to Mrs. Peltzer going full John Wick on gremlins in her kitchen. It’s a genuinely funny monster movie built on the foundation of Christmas. I’m not sure what the appropriate age is to first expose a child to Gremlins…the 80s were a wild time, don’t take their advice. What I do know, with certainty, is that four decades after its release…it remains THE movie that will make that child fall in love with horror, comedy…and Christmas. And a mogwai…so be prepared to shell out for that merch.
Scare Value
Perhaps I can’t look at Gremlins with the unbiased eyes needed for a proper appraisal. It is the movie most responsible for my love of movies. My podcast co-hosts children love it too, however. They have since they first watched it at a for sure too young age (80s kids make for 80s parents). Its greatest power comes from melding gateway horror with comedy…and then marrying it to Christmas. It ranks well on any of those lists individually. When combined…Gremlins is unbeatable.
5/5
Gremlins Links
Streaming on Max
Rent/Buy on VOD from Fandango at Home and Amazon
Buy on Blu-Ray from Amazon
