Bloody Birthday review.
Beware children born during a solar eclipse…like the one that is happening today.
Classic movie reviews will contain spoilers.
Bloody Birthday
Directed by Ed Hunt
Screenplay by Ed Hunt and Barry Pearson
Starring Lori Lethin, Melinda Cordell, Julie Brown, Jose Ferrer, K.C. Martel, Elizabeth Hoy, Billy Jayne and Andrew Freeman
Bloody Birthday Review
The early 80s were a wild time. The number of slasher movies released during that period is astonishing. Contrary to popular belief…they aren’t all the same. Take 1981’s Bloody Birthday, for example. Sure, it’s more Village of the Damned than Friday the 13th…but the novelty of watching evil kids doing evil things rarely disappoints. These three little bastards are among the worst of the bunch. Part of that is due to the suburban setting. Evil in your own backyard will always be more relatable than corn kids or forest monsters. Part of it is due to a cleverness that isn’t normally attached to the creepy kid trope. These kids aren’t creepy. They’re smug, competent, thoughtful little goblins.
The reason we’re talking about this somewhat forgotten slasher flick should be obvious. With solar eclipse fever gripping the nation…it’s finally Bloody Birthday’s time to shine. A solar eclipse lies at the center of this odd little film. Three children (Debbie, Curtis and Steven) are born just as the sun is blocked out by an eclipse. Now…the explanation for their troubles turns out to have nothing to do with the sun being blocked out. The story turns to astrology to explain why three kids are running around without a hint of a conscience. In the world of Bloody Birthday, Saturn being fully blocked on the day of their birth led to their penchant for murder. I guess that’s a relief for anyone born during this year’s big solar eclipse. Saturn is probably still in view somewhere.
That’s the extend of the eclipse’s usage in Bloody Birthday. But just the beginning of its effect. As their birthday approaches, the trio of evil kids set out on a killing spree. It begins with Debbie’s own father, the town sheriff. The effects here are surprisingly slight for the era. Still, the antagonists being children who emotionlessly ravage a town works well. There are some well thought out scenes that lead to death…but rarely anything memorable when the moment comes. It’s the first issue that keeps Bloody Birthday from attain a sustained cult status.
Our heroes in the story are classmate Timmy (K.C. Martel) and his older sister Joyce (Lori Lethin). They catch on to the trio’s shenanigans rather quickly. Timmy is locked inside an old refrigerator and left to die. A familiar horror to any child of the 80s who watched Punky Brewster. Seriously…old refrigerators are to 80s kids what “duck and cover” was to 50s children. Luckily, Timmy escapes. This sets him up as a continuing target for the trio.
It takes Joyce longer to figure it out…but she too will end up in the group’s (literal) crosshairs. This leads to an aspect of Bloody Birthday that makes its evil kids a bit more interesting than the standard of the time. Knowing that Joyce is on to them…Curtis tricks her into believing he has put poison in the frosting of their birthday cakes. Her subsequent outburst discredits her in the eyes of the community. His knowing smirk creating one of the few times it’s probably acceptable to strike a child.
Bloody Birthday contains all the dressings you expect from a slasher of its time. Namely, nudity. A random couple has sex in a van. They have no other purpose to the plot. Debbie drills a peep hole between her room and her older sister Beverly (Julie Brown). She charges kids a quarter to watch Beverly undress. It’s worth noting that this is a few months before Porky’s came out. Also, that it involves ten-year-olds. The peephole will come into play again when Debbie shoots an arrow through Beverly’s eye. It’s probably Bloody Birthday’s best kill. Many of the kills involve shooting adults with remarkable accuracy. The most elaborate scene sees Joyce terrorized by a car in a junk yard. She makes it much more difficult to elude than it should be.
The second thing that Bloody Birthday is lacking is a sense of humor. Outside of a couple (probably) unintentional cuts to funerals that are absolutely hilarious…the story is played far too seriously. Opportunities for dark humor are abundant. Debbie and Curtis play their roles in a way ripe for a camp feel the movie never tips toward. Lethin’s Joyce has multiple turns of hysteria that provide some (again, probably) unintentional laughs. Had Bloody Birthday arrived around 1986…it would undoubtedly have been a slasher comedy. People weren’t thinking that way in 1981.
The third, and biggest, obstacle to Bloody Birthday’s success is a woefully underwhelming climax. After watching the trio murder family members and community pillars (and random amorous couples) for a long time…they never get their just rewards. Curtis and Steven seem to get into some sort of legal trouble…but Debbie’s mother moves her away and changes their names. We see that she is continuing her murderous ways…which would be a find stinger for one of the characters. The other two needed to die. The last we see of Curtis…he is smirking his smug smirk, decidedly not dead. It’s a real bummer. Presented as characters you enjoy hating…waiting for them to get what’s coming to them is half the fun of Bloody Birthday. Letting them walk away unscathed deflates that balloon.
There’s a version of Bloody Birthday that could stand as a classic of early 80s slashers. The bones are there…but it misses the mark on the fun stuff. Better gore effects, some intentional humor, and a fitting (bloody) ending for the trio would have made a decent movie into an absolute blast. The kids (mostly Debbie and Curtis) do a great job with their characters. It’s a shame the movie doesn’t do a better job by them.
Scare Value
Outside of its central concept, Bloody Birthday is surprisingly tame for a 1981 slasher movie. The kids aren’t alright thanks to a solar eclipse that occurred during their birth. The movie, however, is alright. Rarely more than alright, sadly. The biggest misstep comes from depriving us of seeing these little monsters get their glorious gratuitous 80s style comeuppance. It robs the movie of its chance of becoming a true cult classic.
2.5/5
Bloody Birthday Links
Streaming on Screambox
Rent/Buy on VOD from Amazon
Buy on Blu-Ray from Amazon
